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seabassJr
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Chess Pie
Chess Pie
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- On a salt bed in Italy ducking flying muffins.
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So, since I'm seriously procrastinating on a major work deadline, I've prepared an extensive dossier on the Great Poop Debate instead 
THE POOP QUOTE
"The past 5-6 weeks of my life have been really really tough...Some things in my personal life that I don't feel comfortable sharing...maybe I will at some point in the future... it just so happened that I took a big step back from sharing so much of my private life with you right before the poop hit the fan so to speak" (3:20)
TIMELINE
-Spring 2013: Jen goes off the pill according to her I'm Pregnant video
-September 18, 2013: Tosh episode airs
-October 3, 2013: Jen addresses the Tosh episode in a shockingly mature, calm manner in the tail end of her Oct 1 Vlogtober vlog (23:45)
-Late Jan 2014: In the Phoenician "poop" video published in mid March 2014, Jen states things have been tough for the past 5-6 weeks. This would be 6 weeks earlier.
-March 2014: The High Frequency Trading scandal hits the press. However, articles state the FBI has been investigating for over a year. So if Poopsie's company was being investigated the fam would have known far earlier.
**March 7-9, 2014: Phoenician getaway
-March 12, 2014: Phoencian "poop" video published
-Late Fall 2014: Jen finally sees a fertility doc (I'm Pregnant video)
-Late December 2014: Jen is diagnosed with polyps (I'm Pregnant video)
-March 2015: Surgery removes polyps (I'm Pregnant video)
-April 2015: Conceives
-July 2015: Announces pregnancy
ANALYSIS OF COMMON BAKERY THEORIES
-Argument against a Utah house ban
Both Jen and Don go on the post-poop getaway. I would think he'd be in the doghouse if he allowed the fam to ban her.
If it was an issue of the Dead Crown Foundation needing her to stay under the radar for tax reasons, she didn't have to be banned, she could just not film.
During the "poop" period (the first quarter of 2014) Jen and Don were actively TTC. No extended solo trips would make sense.
-Argument against the Tosh episode
The episode aired in September 2013. Jen addresses it two weeks later at the end of a vlog in a shockingly mature, calm fashion. According to Jen the "poop" didn't start hitting until early 2014 (see timeline).
-Argument against the High Frequency Trading Scandal
The timing fits that the HFT scandal hit the press right around the "poop"/Phoenician video. However, the FBI announces it had been investigating for about a year. If Poopsie's company was being investigated the fam would have known much earlier; also Poopsie being somewhat of a spokesperson for HFT would likely have known about the investigation generally far earlier as well. Also, Jen states in the "poop video": "The past 5-6 weeks of my life have been really really tough...Some things in my personal life that I don't feel comfortable sharing...maybe I will at some point in the future." It's unlikely that if the Rosses were under investigation for shady business practices, she would ever talk about it.
Argument against a miscarriage:
The timing here would also fit. The "poop"/Phoencian video would have been at the height of her eastern medicine BS. However, she goes into excruciating detail about the tragic failure of fertilized eggs to implant as diagnosed by her acupuncturist's reading of her tongue in her 47 minute I'm Pregnant video which was pretty much an oration on her fertility since her late teens. In the coordinating blog post she goes into the color of the blood she was spotting during her first trimester. It is hard to believe amongst this much over sharing she would have shied away from mentioning a miscarriage in the Pregancy video or at least a "I don't want to go into detail but March was a particularly difficult part of our journey."
CONCLUSION
I'm at a loss, guys!! I was sure the polyp diagnosis was the "poop" but the timing is nearly a year off. Never fear though. It took a year, but we uncovered the identity of Jen's infamous "dear friend." The Great Poop Mystery shall one day be solved!
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166 replies since 12/9/2016, 01:21 30252 views
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